More than ever, people are turning to online dating to find a partner, and older adults are leading the pack in terms of successful online dating.
A survey published in August 2023 by OnePoll and Forbes1 — which polled 5,000 adults on their dating habits — revealed interesting results when age was considered:
Singles between the ages of 43 and 58 found the most success with online dating, with 72% of participants reporting their efforts had led to a romantic relationship.
So, where are all these successful singles over the age of 40 finding their matches?
Data from the Pew Research Center2 found that among daters ages 30 to 49, Tinder, Bumble, and OkCupid were the most widely used dating apps, while daters over 50 preferred Match.com and eharmony (especially among daters over 65).
In this post, I’ll break down what each of these sites offer to daters over 40:
For Singles 40-49
Despite their bad rap, dating sites are a gold mine of dating for all ages, including Gen X and Y:
OkCupid
What if the vapidity of swiping endlessly on profile photos for casual encounters makes you cringe? Studies show3 that older singles are more keen to flock to sites that emphasize profiles and quality matches for long-term relationship seekers.
OkCupid, used by 28% of online daters ages 30 to 49 and 15% of online daters ages 50 to 64, is particularly appealing to singles in their 40s due to its comprehensive approach to matching for long-term partnership.
Unlike many dating apps that prioritize quick swipes, OkCupid allows users to create detailed profiles that showcase their interests, values, and personality traits and aggressively markets to those looking for serious relationships and marriage.
OKCupid users build out their profiles by answering user-generated questions (there are thousands of options to choose from, though OKCupid recommends answering between 50-100 to start). These questions are meant to help people learn unique things about you and for you to find daters who share your interests and beliefs.
BBB rating: Not rated
Trustpilot rating: 1.3 / 5 stars
Read our OkCupid review, or get started on OKCupid right now >>
Tinder…Not just for hookups?
Tinder went online in 2012 and maintains the impression in many minds as a casual hookup site. But is that the whole story?
In a 2017 study published in the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health,4 sociologists polled 3,000 Tinder users to understand their top motivations for using the app. Despite its reputation, motivation for casual hookups ranked number 11 out of 13 categories.
Tinder boasts more than 75 million subscribers, and although the Pew Research data show it’s most popular among daters ages 18 to 29, 44% of people ages 30 to 49 reported using the site/app.
However, manage your expectations. Given the platform's skewed age range (18 to 29 highest user volume), women over 40 looking for companionship are likely to encounter partners significantly younger or those seeking more short-term connections.
BBB rating: Not rated
Trustpilot rating: 1.2 / 5 stars
Read our Tinder review, or get swiping with Tinder now for free >>
Is Bumble bumbling?
Pew’s study shows that 24% of online daters ages 30 to 49 use Bumble. For Generation X and older Millennials, who were born in the late 70s and early 80s and grew up during the rise of “woman power” and the archetype of the modern working woman, there is appeal to Bumble’s format of women making the first move.
Bumble was founded in 2014 by Whitney Wolfe Herd, one of the founders of Twitter, who wanted to give women more power in online dating. Recently, however, Bumble has faced scrutiny over its billboard marketing and changes5 to the platform that now allow men to initiate contact under certain conditions, which may alter the original dynamics that made the app appealing to women.
BBB rating: F
Trustpilot rating: 1.3 / 5 stars
Read our Bumble review, or get matched on Bumble now >>
For Singles 50+
eharmony
eharmony is a standout option for singles aged 40-65+, primarily due to its reputation for fostering long-term, meaningful relationships.
Launched in 2000, eHarmony's matching algorithm is built on an extensive compatibility questionnaire that delves into 32 dimensions of personality, which takes about 20 minutes to complete. eharmony uses the answers you provide to pair you with individuals who share similar values, beliefs, and life goals.
Singles in this age range often have clear ideas about what they want in a partner. The level of detail and focus on compatibility saves time in the long run and increases the likelihood of finding a truly compatible match.
BBB rating: A
Trustpilot rating: 3 / 5 stars
Read our eharmony review or get started with eharmony now >>
Match.com
Established in 1995, Match.com is the grand-daddy of dating applications, with the largest percentage (54%) of singles ages 50-64 signing on. With more than 21 million users in that age range, chances are pretty good that you’ll find a partner who watched all of the “Back to the Future” movies and will agree with you that New Coke was a terrible idea.
While Match allows you to create more comprehensive profiles compared to more modern sites like Tinder and Bumble, the interface looks as if it hasn’t changed much since the ’90s. If you can get past that, there are some clear positives.
Plenty of features can be accessed for free, like viewing profiles, creating one of your own, and sending ‘winks’ to show interest to potential matches. For those who opt for the paid version, Match offers a six-month guarantee for users who don’t get matches initially.
It is worth mentioning that the Pew Study has limitations. Referring back to the graph, a significant number of singles in older age groups are using other smaller, more niche sites, like these:
| Christian dating sites | Jewish dating sites |
| Catholic dating sites | Plenty of Fish |
| Coffee Meets Bagel | Millionaire Match |
BBB rating: Not rated
Trustpilot rating: 1.2 / 5 stars
Check out our Match.com review or start with Match now >>
SeniorMatch…Honorable Mention
SeniorMatch has a large and active community with about 2.7 million members. This platform is specifically designed for singles aged 45 and above, offering features such as advanced search tools and daily match suggestions, making it a great choice for older adults seeking serious relationships or companionship.
BBB rating: F (for parent company Crunchbase)
Trustpilot rating: 2.6 / 5 stars
Big takeaway
So as a woman over 50, here’s my take: I’m all about efficiency of time, and meeting potential matches online fits better in my busy schedule with work and family than meeting people out in the wild.
I am currently in a serious relationship with a lovely man I met on Bumble that I know I would have never met otherwise, despite living less than 40 minutes away. I find that paying for the subscriptions also accelerated my efficiency, and I was able to date multiple qualified candidates all at once and choose the best man for the job.
SOURCES
- “Forbes Health Survey of 5,000 U.S. respondents who have actively dated in the last 5 years,” OnePoll/Forbes Health. August 2023. https://www.forbes.com/health/dating/dating-statistics/
- “Key findings about online dating in the U.S.” by Emily A. Vogels and Colleen McClain for the Pew Research Center. https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2023/02/02/key-findings-about-online-dating-in-the-u-s/
- “Internet Initiated Relationships: Associations between Age and Involvement in Online Dating,” Journal of Computer-Mediated Communication, Volume 14, Issue 3. April 1, 2009. https://academic.oup.com/jcmc/article/14/3/658/4583567
- “Tinder Users: Sociodemographic, Psychological, and Psychosexual Characteristics,” by Juan Ramón Barrada and Ángel Castro. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health. 2020 Nov; 17(21): 8047. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7662763/
- “Women no longer have to make the first move on Bumble. Will it make the app better?” by Claire Murashima for NPR. May 6, 2024. https://www.npr.org/2024/05/06/1249296671/bumble-dating-apps-women-opening-moves
